Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Homework Already?

Hey ya'll school hasn't started, but they gave us a book to read called "Class Matters", plus an assignment that is due tomorrow. We are to write a first person essay (500 words or less), considering issues of class, race, gender, religion, ethnicity, and or culture-- or anything else that is important " telling details" about what shaped the person I am today... So I did and I thought I would share it with you guys. I hope I don't sound too crazy! Oh yeah I think the title is kind of crazy but I am going with it, just to see what happens. Leave a comment and tell me your honest thoughts. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Please excuse any errors you may find. Hence the reason I am attending school to become a great writer...and I thank you.

Same Face Different Story

Twenty- five years ago I was born too lower class parents-- a warehouse worker for a father, and a housekeeper for a mother, at Parkland County Hospital in Dallas, TX. Growing up in my neighborhood everyone’s story was familiar. African-American, single parents, unhappy two parent homes, poor housing ‘one step’ up from the projects, sub par
education system, with people who are only familiar with our surroundings. North Dallas, Arlington, Irving, and other suburban areas were home to the white population. Most Mexican- Americans at the time lived in one small area near my neighborhood.
I attended school with those who where just like me, but never understood me, many thinking I was in the wrong place, and never really knowing my story. Even though I was just like everyone else, I always stuck out like a sore thumb.
I have moved nearly 30 times (yes, literally 30) in my short life. I have lived in what some would consider the worst neighborhoods and the best neighborhoods in Dallas. By attending church every Saturday I received the outlet to engage with others -- working, middle, and upper class. Although they appeared to be like me, of the same ethnicity, race, religion, our cultural backgrounds were extremely different. Recognizing this difference I sought to become part of their culture. I was taught by my father a ‘street wise’ mentality, while my mother reminded me to remember my feminine side, and my faith in God. However, I forgot most of the things my mother said, and portrayed myself as my father instilled in me to be at a young age.
It was not until my teenage and adult years, did I socialize with individuals from other cultures, and ethnics. Due to my shallow mind develop from growing up it was hard to adjust, so I reverted to my comfort zone. The desire to succeed never left for me, thankfully I was granted the chance to move in a neighborhood, I had previously seen in pictures. The world around me completely dismissed everything I knew to be true. My thoughts on family, race, culture, and religion changed. My erratic behavior, fear, and bizarre ideas on life hinder me for a moment. Remembering my past and not wanting to return, I embraced the new culture I felt had been awaiting me for years. Today, I am able to attend Columbia College in an environment that takes diversity to the limit. Years ago, I would have shied away from such an experience. Now I am ready to indulge, learn, experience, and most of all enjoy this journey.

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

My baby is grown...

Check out the Fantasia video on the side bar I love that song...

Ya'll I can't believe my baby sister went to college today. I hate I wasn't there to help her start her new journey. I think she is going to be fine though. The year was 1989 the month was Sept, the day was the 1st, and this little mean looking baby was born and placed in my hands, we called Amber . Of course she cried when she opened her eyes and looked at me. But I am sure she didn’t expect for me to look at her and start crying also…lol what a hassle it was raising her, ya'll she drove me crazy. I have her life all planned out so she shouldn't make any mistakes...JUST KIDDING! How weird is it that we are in college together. The dude at orientation was like hello class of 2011. For a moment I was like DDDDDAAAANNNNGGGGG that is forever. Then I realize it wouldn't take me that long. I remember my baby sister always wanting to go everywhere I went. I had to take her on dates with me back in high school. She never let me go on a date with her...lol. Once Derrick and I took her out for her b-day, and she wanted to drink liquor so bad. While Amber and her friend was in the bathroom we told the waitress to bring her a drink, and we were going to all pretend that it had liquor in it. I wish I could have video tape how they were acting drunk. They even said they could taste the liquor in the drink. After laughing so hard we finally told them there was no liquor in the drink, the expression on their faces was priceless...LOL
Amber is attending SWAU (Southwestern Adventist University Keene, TX), now if she gets in trouble out there she definitely went and looked for it. There is absolutely nothing to do in Keene, TX but pray! Yep my baby is going to be 18 next Sat. Where does the time go, these kids grow up so fast. I ask that you all keep her in your prayers because she has never been away from home. I know God will protect her and hopefully she will stay focus on graduating so she can make my money...HA!

Offically a college student...

The year is 1994 I was 12yrs. old, the month is May or June, and the day is ummm I don't remember. It’s like it was yesterday, I had flew to Chicago alone for my twin cousin’s high school graduation. I was riding with my Uncle Carl and Aunt Linda in downtown Chicago. This particular day my Uncle was showing me his office downtown. While riding in the backseat I remember looking at this amazing skyline, thinking man I would love to live here someday. At the tender age of 12 I never thought my dream would come true. You see when I was younger I never really believed in dreams. Today my dream became a reality! I attended the New Student Orientation at Columbia College. WOW, is all I have to say. Where was this school when I graduated from high school in 1999? In the mist of all the excitement, a few thoughts ran through my head today.
First, I felt really out of my element since I have only attended black schools my whole life. This time the black people are few and far between. My cousin Carl came with me as my "dad for the day" who was great and helped me relax. Oh yeah I didn’t sleep at all last night because I was so excited like a true GEEK! Even though I have attended college in the past, I never experience orientation and all the hoopla that comes with starting college. Second, I realize I was probably the oldest in the room except for the parents. Thanks to my great gene pool I don't look a day over 19...lol. Lastly, I almost cried thanking God for finally getting me to this point. This school offers everything you can think of to prep you for your career. We registered for classes everyone else enrolled for 12-15 credit hours. I smiled and told my advisor I needed no more than 6 credit hours. (On a budget folks) I met some new people, and most of all I am excited about starting school. I wish you guys could see my id pic, it’s so cheesy. You won't believe they gave us a book to read and would like an essay on the book next week… I am excited about that also.

Last Week...

Hey folks I have been a little busy, not really I just haven’t had access to a computer, so I am posting a little late. Let me update you on last week before we move forward. Oh yeah I am pleased to announce that I got a pedicure and a job last week...look how good God is!

My cousin and I went to an independent film called "Sarbane's Oxley" it was great!
I learn how to step at Chicago Public Library. Those of you who know me are aware I have absolutely no rhythm so you can imagine what I look like trying to dance...yes terrible but it was fun.
I finally enjoy being at home alone
I realize I can cook pretty well
I walked into Ebony magazine thinking I was going to get a job on the spot, you should have seen me. My confidence level was on full blast that day, you would've thought I already graduated from Columbia College in Journalism.
I didn't go to Jamba Juice or Taco Burrito
I was supposed to go on a date. Why didn't I go you ask, because I had a life sized pimple on my top lip. Pimples on your face people think you just have bad skin, but not on your lip...lol

Oh ya'll this MUST stop happening, another random dude story...
Being from Texas I say "hi" or "how are you" to almost everyone. When I got on the bus the other day, I see what my friend and I use to call “of great glory" (meaning a very handsome man). The bus was pack so I went to a seat I saw in the back. I say my usually "hey how you doing" now in my mind I am talking to the handsome guy, but instead who hears me, the old toothless dude standing in front of him. His response" not good enough since I don't know you", how come the fine dude didn't hear me? Well of course I pretended I didn't hear him and went to my seat.

City Dogs: My guy friend and I were sitting outside and we came to the stunning conclusion that most of these dog owners and their dog’s kind of look alike. It might just be me…LOL!

Well I think that is all folks for last week.

Monday, August 13, 2007

Its never really bad....oh yeah more random thoughts

The other night I was out about 1 a.m. and I saw this lady sitting on a park bench with her daughter on her lap sleep. I assume they were homeless and they had to sleep there. After seeing them I begin to realize how much I complain, when in reality nothing I am experiencing is worst than sleeping on a park bench with your child. From that point on I decided to tell myself that it’s never bad. As long as I have shelter, food, clothes, friends, family, and a functioning body it is never a bad day. This week alone I have seen more mothers with children homeless and it breaks my heart. I've had my share of odd jobs that I hated and some I quit, but thank God he allowed me to bounce back. Chicago is a great city; however everywhere you look you can find a constant reason to say Thank you Jesus, because it could have been me.

So what interesting things did I do this week...?

I went to Borders and read for 3 hours to avoid talking to this man. The conversation went like this...

Random Dude: Excuse me, may I ask your age?
Me: Sure I am 25 why?
Random Dude: I must say you look very young from the neck up, and like a grown woman from the neck down.
Me: WTF are you talking about! (screaming in my head) Well sir thank you for the observation
Random Dude: So what’s your sign?
Me: Get the hell out of my face(in my head)... I reply, Scorpio
Random Dude: Well I am a Virgo
Me: Oh cool, can you please stop putting your hands on me
Random Dude: Oh, I am sorry Miss Lady, so can I get a name and number I can reach you at
Me: Ummm let me think about that as I read my magazines in Borders (walk off quickly)
Random Dude: Ok you promise I will be out here working till 6
Me: Ok cool (I will make sure I read till 630)… lol

Ya'll I went out on a Sat. night by myself, I thought I was toooooo cute last night until I almost fell in the middle of the street...LOL. Then I saw this group of young black people who looked as though they were having a great group discussion. I almost went over to them and asked if I could join the conversation, but I was to shy.

Of course I hit Jamba Juice a couple of times this week
Went to Taco Burrito
I meet some people at an independent film theater
Went to church and read my Sabbath school lesson
I went to dinner and listen to this white lady talk about how she loves black churches. HA!

I was on the train tonight and this black kid was turning back flips in the seat. He kept kicking the hell out of this white guys head. The dude turn around and looked at the mother like he was about to beat the hell out of her kids. I almost died laughing because the guy face was so red. Parents control your bad ass kids.

I know ya'll want to hear more dog stories but you are going to have to wait till next time on "The Journey of Ms. Devereaux"

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Does the truth really work?

Hey ya'll it has been an interesting week. Well not really but saying that it has sounds better...lol. Today I had the privilege of doing manual labor with my uncle which was cool, since I had been doing odd jobs to make money. In the mist of being out in the sun I begin to think about how I could have never been a slave. My aunts told me they would have just beaten me to death since I would’ve been considered lazy. During the conversation I thought about how I use to get beatings when I was younger. I stayed in trouble because I lied a lot. My parents use to say if I told them the truth I wouldn’t get a beating.(Yeah right) One time we were in the store, and I would steal butterscotch candy all the time and eat it as we grocery shop. My mother wouldn't allow me to have any sweets back then. I would pretend I was putting 5 cents in that little box on the Brach’s candy and I would get a hand full and stuff them in my pocket. Usually I would finish them before we got home. This particular time I got caught slipping. Those of you who know my dad already know what he said..."Joy (my nickname) if you tell me the truth I won't whip you"(even though the belt is already in his hand) in my mind, if you caught me with the candy in my mouth why are we having this discussion. Ok I will try this truth thing,” yes daddy I stole the candy" before I knew it the belt stings across my back (not buttocks but my BACK,wrong spot dad) what the hell, you tricked me we had an agreement. I guess they didn't want me to steal anymore so they both whip me in the same day. My mother took the time to pray before she use to whip me. I never understood why after you got a whipping you had to go take a bath. So I decided I was fed up with them and I was going to get them in trouble. Being that I have a light complexion, I figure I can get the marks from my whipping to stay on me until I got to school Monday. This way, I could show what I thought was child abuse to my teacher, and my parents would get in trouble. Not a good idea, not only did they not get in trouble but I got put on punishment. The moral of the story weigh your options before confessing the truth... (J/K always tell the truth ladies and gents)

Saturday, August 4, 2007

I don't have a title it's just random thoughts about my week

Hello all, this week went a little better I think. Let's see what all did I do...

I stayed at home alone for 2 nights which I actually enjoyed.
I spent $90.00 on six bags of grocery
I stayed with an older (80 something to be exact) family member and realized I want to get married and have kids
I question my creative abilities
I went to an AND 1 mix tape basketball game (yes I still like AND 1)
I realized a person will show you their many faces when put in the right situation
I realized I might not be as original as I thought
A married man asked me if I wanted to be his second wife...(CREEPY)
I went to church
I ate at Taco Burrito one of my favorite spots here
I received hair treatment advice from extremely ghetto people from the beauty supply house
I attempted to flat iron my hair with an off brand CHI
I ate alone at a restaurant outside on the patio
I didn't read my Sabbath School lesson
I still don't have a job, but the Lord has great timing.
I met some people but I am paranoid about hanging out with them...LOL (dumb huh?)
I went to a job interview and the cab driver gave me his number... (Weird)
I think I have OCD; I stood at the car making sure it was locked for 5 minutes... (Insane)
My cousin and I ate at a great Thai restaurant across the street
My guardian angel help me get things into perspective once again
I went to Jamba Juice in pj's and a shirt that says "try it you'll like it"...very BAD idea

Staying alone forces you to take a serious look at who you really are. I HATE THAT! To be honest with you, I have always been afraid to have alone time. I never really wanted to look inside and deal with my deeply rooted issues. I mean I can only keep myself occupied for so long until I have to be alone with my thoughts and the voices in my head (j/k there is only 2 voices I hear now). However I really don't think I am crazy. Believe it or not I am brilliant! So the question is WHO AM I? I don't know, but I think I am slowly learning the answer to that question. I definitely might not like all the answers but at least I know them. When I think back over the past I have to wonder if I have been true to myself, I believe the answer might be NO. What the hell does that even mean to be true to yourself?

Oh yeah I have another dog story. I was walking the other day to the beauty supply house (it’s a far cry from an Ulta store), and this guy was walking 2 huge rottweiler's. He stopped and threw their leashes over a fence, and walked into the street to chat with this dude. Mind you I have walked out of my decent neighborhood into the HOOD of Chicago. How do I know it’s the hood because everybody knows that DR.MLK Street is in the hood of every city nation wide, and I was walking on MLK street "the hood".I began to slow down because these dogs looked as though they were going to eat my legs off. The guy saw me slow down and of course he says the same thing all these fools here say "oh they won't bite" the hell they won't. They look like some dogs Michael Vick probably would fight with. I realized that there is no backyard downtown so all these dogs have like their own room possibly that is so crazy to me. Also why doesn't anyone think their dog will bite people? Crazy city people, so that's all for now folks I hope I didn't make you to bored. Goodnight!