Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Confessions of An Addict... Pt.1

You cannot walk with GOD and hold hands with the Devil.

An addiction is a recurring compulsion by an individual to engage in some specific activity.

Can you imagine having an addiction and no matter how bad you want to change your habit it seems impossible? I have a SECRET... I am addict and my drug of choice I won't mention, but I am going to rehab. Today while walking to work I came to this realization. I think we all have addiction whether we admit it or not. Your addiction can be things such as drugs, food, sex, pain, men, women, gambling, shopping, pornography, computers (internet), work, exercise, religion etc. Thinking about my own addiction I begin to feel bad for individuals who are addicted to drugs. I mean, what a hellish life to live when you know you should change but in your mind it seems impossible. I would love to wake up in the morning and be over my addiction, but that is not the way it works instead I keep doing the same thing every single day not being able to control myself. Now I realize I have an addiction I understand how people lose everything because of the money they spend. I don't necessary spend money; however it does cost me alot of time that I can never get back.

Here is what I don't understand, how do you know if you will become an addict to something, and is it an addiction or OCD? What are the signs to recognize if you have addictive behavior? When does the pattern of behavior become an addiction? Is the real problem that addicts don't have self control? I don't know the answers to these questions, maybe ya'll do. What I do know is that I think I might understand what it is like to be a drug addict and I feel bad for them.

I know when ya'll read this most of ya'll are going to be like huh? What is she talking about? I am not addicted to an ILLEGAL DRUG just to clear that up but I do have an addiction. I would like to hear what some of ya’ll have to say about this blog.

Until next time on "The Journey of Ms. Devereaux"

Monday, October 8, 2007

As I Pick My Nails....

Hey folks, as I pick my nails today I figure I would update everyone on what I did this last week. Well this week was a cool and busy some interesting things happen...

I got sick as a dog on Monday, those of you who know me are aware that I am the worst person to get sick. However lucky for me my cousin healed me in hours

I went to another comedy show with Damon Williams and of course I was laughing LOUD!!

I got an internship with I am NERVOUS but I know I can handle it.

We said goodbye to a family member and it was sad.

Oh I went to Andrews University this weekend with Michelle and Meghan to see her twin sister Morgan. On Sabbath morning the devil was on my back, because I had HORRIBLE ATTITUDE. I didn't even want to go to church, but everyone made me go. At first I didn't go in church I sat outside in the car just upset and I really didn't know why other than the fact my hair looked as though I had been in a fight with the comb. Finally I got my attitude together after praying and went into church. Ya'll church was great Dr. Jules from NY preach, the music was great the whole service was amazing. Later that evening we went back to a program they had called "The Celebration of Gospel”. It was GREAT, I have never been to concert I enjoyed that much. The only problems were these girls were sitting behind us talking loud and yelling loud in my ear. You know me, I turned around and ask them to stop and they got pissed and started talking about me and got louder. What do you all think I did then? Despite those chicks I had a great time.

I wonder why I stay up so late; I don't function well in the morning no matter what time I go to sleep.

I am still having emotional hair problems.

It sure seems like a long way till 120 credit hours to graduate from college

Why do people spell their names when its something simple like "Jimmy Brown", but when there name is Ojuebma Witheusebio they don't think they should take the time to spell it, they just sit there and wait for you to ask them to spell their stupid names. (My call center family knows what I mean)

Why do people always feel the need to state the obvious?

Someone left a comment under "bean child" Who are you?

I see my previous post didn't change anything, just like black folks that’s ok I still love my readers. Every week I learn someone new reads my blogs and that is always exciting to me.

I could go on and on but I won't...

Until next time on "The Journey of Ms. Devereaux

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

A Morning Gone Wrong...

Hey folks, I know we have all experienced “A Morning Gone Wrong", if you don't know what I mean let me explain. Have you ever woke up in the morning at 6:50am when you should have gotten up at 6:00am? First, you are upset the clock is going off since it feels like you just closed your eyes 30mins ago. Second, you hope you forgot to cut your alarm off and it’s really the weekend. Third, you realize you have to catch your bus at 7:15am. (At least I have to). Once all this has set in your mind, you immediately leap from your bed not realizing your foot is tangled in the sheets and you hit the floor face first. If you weren't awake before, you definitely are now. In these times seconds count in order to possibly still make it to work on time. Like myself I have to catch the bus(and the bus will drive off while you are running down the street), I know for you all back home it is a matter of what kind of morning traffic you will get caught in. If you are like me, most of you have a routine in the morning but on this tragic morning your routine has to be modified. Now decisions have to be made, do I take a shower or a wash off, what can I wear that doesn't have to be iron, do I get something to eat or just not think about my stomach growling, and there is no time for make-up.

Once you finally get to the door with your clothes hanging half way off your body, ready to get in your car or lock the door that dreadful question rings out... WHERE ARE MY KEYS?!!! You are way past panic mood because the hope you had to make it to work on time has just disappeared. The thought of finding your keys is enough to make you call in to work. You have sweat rolling down your face, heart pounding, you begin running around the house like a chicken with its head cut off. WHEW, you found your keys ok get to work! Due to some freak of nature from the doorstep to your car you manage to drop almost everything in your hand at least once. For me I dropped my money while crossing a busy intersection when the light was about to turn green. After all this has happen you finally get to work on time exhausted, sweaty, stressed, and ready to go home before the day has even begun. Folks this happen to me the other day and I figure it has happen to you also, maybe even this week. If indeed you haven't experienced “A Morning Gone Wrong" be thankful because it’s not fun but it is extremely FUNNY!!!

Until next time on "The Journey of Ms. Devereaux"

Am I Talking To Myself...

Hello my lovely readers, how are you all doing? This blog is to inform you all on the importance of comments on my blog. I felt the need to write this blog because like myself, many of you are new to this experience. I know some of you may think that reading my blog is like reading a book, you don't comment when you read a book so why comment on the blog? Well I am glad you asked. As the writer of the blog I am extremely interested in knowing my readers thoughts. When my readers don't comment it’s like I am having a conversation with myself. There are times when my blogs don't always require a response, you may not have anything to say, or you might not feel comfortable writing your name (hint: anonymous) I can understand those occasions. However, on this last blog "I Don't Want To Grow Up" there was a direct question which required an answer from my readers.

Another important point about comments is that it allows me too see who reads my blogs, and I also see if my audience is growing. When I speak with some of you over the phone I definitely appreciate your comments on how you enjoy my blogs. All I am saying people is that as much as you enjoy reading my blogs I enjoy reading your comments, it’s exciting. Now knowing black folks I can't help but think nothing will change, but for once I will be optimistic.

Thank you in advance for you cooperation.

Thank you to my readers who already comment I love you!

Until next time on "The Journey of Ms. Devereaux"